Intern retention: 100% (they are chicks) Wayne-related incidents: 3 ▼ Shareholder satisfaction: Breezie declined to comment Yolk quality index: exceeding guidance

Shelter Bay, BC · Est. by Breezie

A vertically integrated egg conglomerate.

Mountain Chicken Media is a founder-led poultry operation delivering premium farm-fresh eggs and industry-leading corporate content. Our C-suite has feathers. Our deliverables have shells.

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Audited by no one
A red hen standing upright on a forest path, looking at the camera like a CEO headshotMountain Chicken Media chicken-foot logo

Meet the executive flock.

A flat hierarchy, except when Breezie is standing on something.

A black hen standing on a patio chair and staring at the camera
01 / Chief executive

Breezie

Founder, public face, and final authority on all snack-related policy.

Chief Eggsecutive Officer

A hen looking calmly at the camera from low to the ground
02 / Operations

Wayne

Maintains a calm exterior while quietly escalating every situation.

VP, Unscheduled Movement

A hen with her beak and comb filling the camera lens
03 / Culture

Jessica

Owns internal communications. Most of them are loud and before sunrise.

Director, People & Pecking

The media division.

Strategic communications from a team with no Wi-Fi and several opinions.

A young chick standing upright on the grass as if about to presentWeekly intelligence

Chicken Fact Friday

Critical poultry information presented with the confidence of a peer-reviewed study and none of the paperwork.

See it on Instagram → Hens lined up in a row on the coop roost like a board meetingOrganizational development

Pecking Order

Leadership lessons from inside an institution where influence is earned one mealworm at a time.

See it on Instagram → A hen pushing her beak straight into the camera lensExecutive coaching

Rude Motivation

Short, useful advice from management. Encouragement has been removed for efficiency.

See it on Instagram → Hens walking down the gravel road toward the cameraField reporting

Notes from the Coop

Operational updates, reputational incidents, and the occasional dust-bath acquisition.

See it on Instagram →

“We believe every egg deserves a clear route to market and every chicken deserves a completely unnecessary job title.”

Q3 deliverables, now shipping*

Every egg is laid on-site by a member of our executive team, inspected by middle management, and released only after Jessica signs off. Which she will. Eventually.

Today’s supply: Checking with management…
Core asset

One dozen

Twelve locally produced eggs. Variance in colour reflects executive diversity.

$7 · Garage pickup
Growth package

Two dozen

For households with aggressive breakfast targets and a tolerance for inventory.

$14 · Garage pickup

*“Shipping” means pickup in the garage in Shelter Bay, BC, anytime eggs are listed. Pay by cash or e-transfer. Our logistics department is a wagon. Questions: eggs@mountainchickenmedia.com

The procurement office.

Every item below has been used on site, reviewed by the C-suite and approved for facilities use.

Dept. 01Hydration & Feeding

Vendor 01

Waterer nipples, 12-pack

Horizontal side mount. Water on demand. Staff were briefed once and have not requested a second meeting.

Approve purchase on Amazon → Vendor 02

Waterer cups, 8-pack

The DIY drinking program. Low maintenance, high uptake, no complaints filed.

Approve purchase on Amazon → Vendor 03

Feeder and waterer set

Self-serve infrastructure with a shut-off valve. Management has stepped away from the supply chain.

Approve purchase on Amazon → Vendor 04

Six-port feeder and waterer kit

A scalable solution for organizations planning to grow headcount.

Approve purchase on Amazon → Vendor 05

Dried black soldier fly larvae, 5 lb

Performance incentive. Attendance at afternoon check-ins improves sharply.

Approve purchase on Amazon →
Chicks eating yogurt and blueberries from a red dish
Catered lunch. Attendance mandatory.

Dept. 02Facilities & Hygiene

Vendor 06

Hemp nesting box liners, 5-pack

Premium surfaces for the egg production line. Quality assurance begins at the nest.

Approve purchase on Amazon → Vendor 07

First Saturday Lime, 5 lb

Sanitation and odour control. Facilities handles this. Facilities is a human.

Approve purchase on Amazon → Vendor 08

Poop scooper and rake

Adjustable handle, sifting capability. The primary instrument of accountability.

Approve purchase on Amazon →

Dept. 03Security & Access

Vendor 09

Automatic coop door

Battery powered. Opens at dawn, closes at dusk, does not accept feedback on the schedule.

Approve purchase on Amazon → Vendor 10

Slide bolt gate latches, 2-pack

Heavy duty perimeter control. Does not care who is knocking.

Approve purchase on Amazon → Vendor 11

Barrel bolt locks, 3 inch, 2-pack

A secondary security layer. Redundancy is a policy, not a weakness.

Approve purchase on Amazon → Vendor 12

Stainless slide bolt latch

Rust-resistant entry control. Approved for outdoor use.

Approve purchase on Amazon →
The coop with its ramp, waterers and hens waiting at the door
Access control. One ramp, no appointments.

Dept. 04Hardware & Fixtures

Vendor 13

Heavy duty gate hinges, 10-pack

Structural hardware. Nobody thinks about it until it fails.

Approve purchase on Amazon → Vendor 14

T-strap hinges, 4 inch

Keeps the doors attached to the organization.

Approve purchase on Amazon → Vendor 15

Barn door handles, 8-piece

Black metal pulls. Used by staff who have no hands and by the human who does.

Approve purchase on Amazon →

Some links earn the company a commission. Procurement is not a charity. As an Amazon Associate we earn from qualifying purchases.

Investor relations.

Forward-looking statements may involve feathers, weather, or personal grudges.

14Headcount
4dzDaily guidance
100%Founder controlled
0Independent directors
Yellow chicks huddled under an orange heat lamp
Fig. 1. Legacy interns, pre-egg. Included in headcount.

Members of the Board only

Egg procurement is restricted to known associates of the company. Enter the password issued to you by management.

Passwords are issued at management’s discretion. Management is a chicken.